Montessori Blueberry Muffin Recipe for Young Children

I finally got around to making a pictorial blueberry recipe for my boys (age 7 and age 5) to make independently. Independent baking from a young age is an integral part of Montessori because it builds so many crucial skills: self-confidence, the ability to follow multi-step directions, problem-solving, and focus and concentration. It also prepares them for independence in college and life!

I made sure everything they needed was within reach without help. I store the following things on their shelf: mixing bowl, muffin mix, whisk, bowl for cracking eggs, canola oil, muffin pan, the recipe, and measuring cups. Everything else is stored in our kitchen in a place that they can easily reach: eggs, milk, blueberries, compost bin, oven mitts, and dish towels. 

I gave them a "lesson" before they started. I explained that it requires a lot of maturity to be able to make blueberry muffins on your own. They would need to work together, not fight, and handle their freedom with responsibility. They would need to get everything out before they started and then put things away as they finished using them. Finally, they would need to wash the dishes and clean the counters. I explained that if they weren't able to do all of those things, they would lose their freedom to make muffins. We would put everything away and they would have a chance to try again when they were a little older. 

The process could not have gone more smoothly (which is rare around these parts!). They took the task very seriously. I overhead things like, "Tate, be sure to carry the bowl with two hands." 

We set boundaries around the muffins as well: one muffin per day, only after they are totally dressed (with shoes on). I have never seen my children dress so quickly! 

If you have younger children, you could do something simpler with this mix. The recipe I created uses this delicious mix. 

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Montessori Advice: Packing Lunches

Despite the fact (or maybe because of the fact?) that Henry has been involved in the kitchen from a very young age, he doesn't enjoy helping in the kitchen. Sure, he'll jump on the bandwagon if we're making something like brownies, but he really doesn't want to be involved in the day-to-day: dishes, setting the table, helping with dinner, etc.

However, I want him to contribute to our household and our family as much as possible. I want him to understand that each person has a role to play in helping our household run. 

I returned to the handbook from a private Montessori school for guidance. Here's what it says about how to involve children with preparing lunches over the years:

2 years = Talk with your child about preparing their lunch while the child watches. It will make more sense to your child if you prepare it slowly and methodically. 

3-4 years = Your child can help by handing things to you or getting things for you, such as a towel, cutting board, etc. Your child should stay with you until the task is complete.

4 years = Show your child slowly and carefully how to prepare one part of the lunch. 

4+ years = Now your child can prepare the part of the lunch that they were shown. This continues for about three weeks.

4.5 years = Now show your child how to prepare a second part of the lunch. 

5-6 years = You and your child work together to prepare the lunch.

6-7 years = Your child can now prepare the fruits and the vegetables while you prepare the sandwich. 

7-8 years = Your child watches how to make the sandwich and how to clean up afterwards. They take on this task, while you switch to the fruit and the vegetable. You prepare lunch together.

8-9 years = Your child can now prepare their entire lunch while you are nearby for supervision.

9-10 years = Your child continues to prepare the entire lunch while you are doing another task in close proximity for company and acknowledgement. 

I read the handbook in front of Henry, so now he is invested in preparing the fruit and the vegetables. We do things like snap peas, cucumbers (he can peel and cut them), dried raspberries, red bell pepper, etc. It's been working well! 

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Update on Montessori For All

Those of you who have been around these parts for a while have heard me talk about my dream to start a non-profit organization that would open Austin's first public Montessori school and then open other public Montessori schools in diverse cities across the U.S. I wrote many posts about "dwelling in possibility." If you're interested, you can read all about it (along with other cool public Montessori stuff happening) in an article from One Day Magazine called: "How a Montessori Movement is Reinventing Public Schools." It's been a lot of years in the making and has required a lot of sacrifice, but I'm so honored to get to do this work. 

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Montessori Books

Simone from The Montessori Notebook e-mailed me about a great new resource she just created. You can find a link to 100 Montessori books for children under four here. Thanks, Simone!

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Montessori: Let Children Make Mistakes

I recently wrote this piece for our school newsletter and wanted to share it with you, since so many of you are parents, too! 

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My oldest son is in PK4 at Magnolia Montessori For All. Recently, his teacher let me know that he got a little injury in class. He had purposefully been using a pin puncher incorrectly. 

A pin puncher is a slightly sharp object that is used to punch out a shape. It is designed to strengthen a child’s hand in preparation for writing. My son had gotten a warning from another child about how to use it properly, as well as from the teacher. Still, he insisted on using it improperly. He ended up accidentally sticking his finger. 

At this point, you are probably wondering, “Where is she going with this story? How is this possibly a positive thing to highlight about the school?” While this story seems like it’s about my son getting hurt, it’s actually about the importance of teaching our children that they are trusted, that they must be responsible with their freedom, and that there are real risks if they are not. 

One of the most important things to learn in life is how to handle freedom with responsibility. After all, life is full of choices—choices that will bring us up or bring us down. Once we are adults, no one can make those choices for us except ourselves. 

In Montessori, we do everything in our power to guide children to learn how to make responsible choices for themselves—choices that bring them up in life. We start this process very young because it takes a long time to teach children how to handle freedom well. If we want 16 year-olds to be able to drive a car on their own responsibly or an 18 year-old to wake themselves up and go to a 9am class in college, we have to give them real opportunities to be responsible for themselves and to be careful as they are growing up. 

Teaching responsibility is difficult because it means our children will sometimes fail, face disappointment, or even get hurt. But when we allow them to experience these things over an extended time in a gradual way, they build the confidence and resilience they need to be successful in college and the world beyond. 

Photos courtesy of Hank & Tank Photography (my husband!)

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Reading in a Montessori Way

It's been amazing to watch Henry's reading progression at Montessori school. He is finishing up PK4 and he loves trying to read everything around him in the world. 

Tate watches Henry intently and wants to follow along. It feels like the right time to start introducing him to the initial, pre-reading activities, including the "I Spy" game. 

In the "I Spy" game, you start by making sure that the child can name all the objects. Once they know the names of everything, then you can set out one object and say, "I spy with my little eye something that starts with __". Then you progress to two objects (with very different sounds) and then three objects, etc. while the child matches the sound to the object.

If I felt like I had any capacity in my life (I'm just barely hanging on, Friends!), I would go around and collect objects for the entire alphabet. Instead, I purchased this set from Montessori Services. I'm excited to play with Tater!

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Montessori Bread Recipe

I remember reading an article one time that was written by a mother who was committed to teaching her teenage son how to cook and do laundry before he went off to college. While I wholeheartedly agree that young adults should be prepared to take care of themselves, I believe that teaching independence, self care, and care of others should start much, much younger. In the Montessori tradition, these "Practice Life" activities start around 18 months of age. 

Children learn so much from engaging in Practical Life activities. They build their focus and concentration, strengthen their fine- and gross-motor skills, learn how to hold multi-step directions in their heads, and--most importantly--build a deep, internal sense of confidence that is attached to their own sense of competence.

Henry was so proud of making a loaf of bread from scratch. And it was delicious! We used Kylie's recipe from the book we co-authored called Kids in the Kitchen: Simple Recipes That Build Independence and Confidence the Montessori Way. What a brilliant recipe, Kylie! It was so easy and delicious. Henry is learning how to follow the recipes by looking at the pictures. 

Ingredients:

• 1.5 c of warm water
• 1.5 T dried yeast
• 4 c whole wheat flour
• 1/4 c olive oil
• 1/4 c honey
• 1.5 t salt

Directions

• Add yeast and honey to warm water
• Mix to dissolve and set aside
• Measure and add flour to bowl
• Add salt to bowl
• Mix
• Make a well in the center of the bowl
• Add oil
• Add warm water, honey, and yeast mixture to bowl
• Mix well until the dough forms a ball
• Flour the counter (or work surface)
• Place dough on floured surface and knead for approximately five minutes
• Add dough to bowl
• Cover bowl with a warm towel and leave in a warm place
• Set timer for 20 minutes and check dough until it has doubled in size
• Remove risen dough from bowl and briefly knead the dough
• Shape the dough into a loaf
• Place the dough on a baking tray
• Bake for 30 minutes at 350 degrees
• Allow to cool and serve

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Update on Toilet Training our 23 Month-Old

I'm so sorry I didn't post the winner of our contest last week! The winner of a free copy of Toilet Awareness by Sarah Moudry is....

Erika K. Thanks for this. I need a jumpstart for our 22 mo old!

Congratulations, Erika! Please e-mail me your address!

Toilet learning has been going really well with Tate at 23 months-old. He is so much less resistant than Henry was about sitting on the toilet frequently. Every hour or so, I say, "Tate, let's go put some pee in the toilet!" He is sometimes resistant to stop whatever he is doing, so I will often encourage him to bring it with him. If we go out, I just bring his little toilet with us.

If he has an accident in his underwear, it's only a little bit of urine because he's putting pee in the toilet nearly every hour.

When we're swimming, he can tell when he needs to go pee. He gets out of the water, walks over to the edge of the backyard, and pees.

So far, so good!

P.S. This photo isn't what his experience normally looks like. We did purchase this seat insert for the big toilet, but he still typically uses his little toilet.

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Toilet Training in a Montessori Way: Win a Free Book!

The Montessori approach to toilet learning is very different from the conventional approach. First, we call it "learning" rather than "training," which sounds like semantics, but it actually highlights a conceptual difference. We don't use rewards to train children; we set up an environment that allows them to teach themselves how to use the toilet. 

Extrinsic rewards like stickers, candy, and other special treats work like magic, but, if overused, they can create children who are dependent upon adults in order to make good decisions. I saw the effect of this when I was a first-year teacher. I worked at a school in rural Louisiana that had corporal punishment, so I worked very hard to never send children to the principal's office. Instead, I relied on all sorts of extrinsic motivation to get my children to make positive choices. And it worked! But then they would move on to 4th grade and all of the motivation dissipated because I was no longer there dolling out the rewards. 

Then I moved to a middle school that used the same kind of extrinsic motivation system of rewards and punishments. I thought it would work better because we were using the same system consistently for four years. However, once the children went onto high school, the same thing happened. They hadn't really internalized anything that we had been trying to teach through rewards and punishments.

When I found my way to Montessori, I learned all about how using extrinsic motivation can actually hinder the development of intrinsic motivation. At a workshop I attended, the speaker explained really clearly that using extrinsic motivation creates children who are dependent upon adults for affirmation. When those same children become middle-schoolers, they shift their dependence to their peers instead of their parents and are are more likely to make bad decisions in order to get affirmation from their peers. 

So the toilet learning process uses very natural consequences in order to enable children to learn how to use the toilet independently. Here's the process:

1. Start very young. Montessorians tend to start the toilet learning process with children between 12 and 18 months. We started Henry at 18 months, but we have not yet started with Tate (who is 22 months). We are going to start wholeheartedly this summer.
2. Set up the environment to support independence. Children need a comfortable toilet (like this one), a place to get fresh underwear, a basket to put dirty underwear, a stepping stool up to get up to the sink, access to soap, and a towel to dry their hands. 

After that, the process is really simple (and hard!). You simply help your child put on training underwear instead of diapers. I love the Hanna Anderson underwear because it is very absorbent and doesn't let pee splash out onto the floor, but it's also expensive so we use Target ones as well. About every hour, you tell them that it's time to use the toilet. They will inevitably have accidents. You simply help them change into new underwear and repeat. 

The most helpful book I've read on this topic is Toilet Awareness by Sarah Moudry. I'm thrilled that she offered to do a giveaway on Feeding the Soil! 

To enter to win a free copy of Toilet Awareness:

• Leave a comment with your first name and the first letter of your last name
• Enter by Friday, June 5th at 11:59pm EST
• Only one entry per person (but you can ask your friends and family to enter on your behalf!)

I will announce the winner on Monday and ask that person to e-mail me their address. 

Happy Entering! 

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Montessori Practical Life: Four Years-Old

This past weekend, I was in Boulder for a Montessori workshop. It was focused on the concept of "Child Study"--bringing teacher teams together to brainstorm strategies for children who are struggling. 

We practiced the process with a child who has autism. The presenting teacher talked about how much screen time the child gets at home and how it makes it more difficult to pull the child into reality during the school day. 

I definitely try to limit Henry's screen time. I only resort to it if I need to take a nap on the weekend (which, um, is often). I'll pull out the laptop and set him up to watch Caillou, Bob the Builder, or Handy Manny. 

Instead of screen time, I try to fill his days with experiences that let him exercise his five senses and have concrete interactions with the world, especially during this stage of development (from 0-6) when is mind is absorbing the environment and constructing itself significantly. 

I try to fit in as much practical life as possible. Honestly, Henry really only enjoys practical life that is connected to food, so I take what I can get. On Sunday he was hungry for eggs, so he got out the bowl, eggs, compost, whisk, and apron. It's amazing to see how independent he has become since starting in the kitchen around 18 months of age.

Watching him work just reiterated how important it is to build children's independence in the areas of self-care and practical life. The best form of self-confidence comes from feeling competent. 

These kinds of experiences teach so much: multi-step directions, focus, concentration, problem-solving, and critical-thinking. And they result in delicious food!  

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REMINDER: The next Purposeful Conception Course: Preparing Your Mind, Body, and Life for Pregnancy starts April 20. Register today! We'd love to have you join us!

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Montessori Practical Life: 19 Months

According to Montessori theories of child development, children start demonstrating a readiness for practical life activities between 15 and 18 months. I feel badly that I haven't sufficiently supported Tate's development in this area. He's definitely ready! The other day I handed him the pizza sauce and the spreader, and he applied the sauce to our pizza crust. He can also transfer laundry into the machine, carry a child-sized basket from the bedroom to the washer and dryer, and put away his clothes and shoes. I bet he would even help wash the dishes if I could muster up the patience and time to support him! It's amazing what little children can do. They are capable of so much. It's easy to let months go by before realizing they are capable of something because they grow faster than our perceptions of them do. 

Supporting children to engage in practical life activities around the home does so much. It helps them develop focus and concentration. It helps them master the ability to follow multiple-step directions, which prepares their brain for future academic learning. Further, it helps them develop a profound sense of self and confidence that comes through feeling competent. They learn that they can interact with the world around them and have an impact on it.

This article is a great overview of the benefits of Practical Life activities! 

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Enter to Win: Montessori Documentary, Edison's Day

Friends, 

I am so happy to be able to offer a free copy of Edison's Day. It is my absolute favorite Montessori documentary. I have gushed about it many times. It's a 30-minute glimpse into the life of a Montessori family. Edison is 20 months-old in the documentary, and you follow him through the day. There are beautiful scenes of him pouring water for a friend during lunch, helping his dad wash the family car, and helping his mom make dinner. I was (and continue to be) blown away by what a 20 month-old can do when the environment is set up in a way that supports his or her needs. It is so easy to underestimate what children are capable of. This film is beautiful and inspiring. I have watched it countless times and gain new ideas every single time.

The mother in the film, Sarah Moudry, is a knowledgeable and amazing Montessorian. You could not believe my surprise when I found a Montessori "Mommy and Me" class in Houston and she was the instructor. I felt like I was meeting a celebrity! I enrolled Henry when he was just five weeks old and stayed late after every class to pepper her with questions. I now regularly read her blog. 

I am thrilled to be able to host a contest to give away a free copy of Edison's Day (valued at $45). 

To enter the contest:

• Please leave a comment with your first name and first two letters of your last name. 
• Enter by Friday, September 26, 2014 by 11:59pm CST. 
• Only one entry per person, please (but feel free to have family members enter on your behalf!).

The winner will be announced the following Monday. I will wait to hear from the winner for one week. If I do not hear from him or her by then, I will draw another winner.

Happy Entering! 

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Montessori Moments: 3 Year-Old & 10 Month-Old

These "Montessori Moments" posts are meant to highlight some of the ways we implement the Montessori method in our home. Many of the activities that are featured--cooking, cleaning together, going out into nature, etc.--overlap with other parenting philosophies or might seem like things that parents just do with their children intuitively. I've still chosen to highlight them here because they are integral to the Montessori approach to parenting and education and fit within a comprehensive continuum of activities that support children as they undergo the important work of forming themselves. For more information about incorporating Montessori into the home, I recommend How to Raise an Amazing Child the Montessori Way for a basic overview. For more insight into Montessori as an educational philosophy, I recommend Montessori Today. When trying to implement Montessori with infants and toddlers, I recommend Montessori from the Start and Joyful Child, as well as my favorite resource, which is a DVD documentary of Montessori at home with a 20 month old called Edison's Day.

It's amazing watching a baby play with a simple ball and box toy. Babies are just amazing. I never had this Object Permanence Box (featured above) with Henry (I tried using this one from Amazon instead by pulling out the rubber and putting away the mallet), but my friend lent this one to me for Tate, and I love it. He is so engaged with this work. I highly recommend it. 

I love that baby stage when they start pulling up on everything and trying to use everything and anything as a walker. Take has been using his walker wagon like crazy these days! Rather than lead a child by their hands to "walk" them, in a Montessori environment we teach them how to pull up on their own and direct the walker wagon to walk themselves. They start to build their confidence and their sense of self through their interactions with the environment. It's amazing to watch. We purchased this walker wagon for Henry (and will donate it to the Nido environment at my school when we're done with it), but in retrospect I wish we would have purchased the Radio Flyer Walker Wagon. It serves the same function of being super sturdy so the youngest ones can pull themselves up, but it has the added benefit of being able to (comfortably) fit older children, so its use is extended a lot longer.   

Henry and I have been doing a lot of puzzles these days. Our favorites are:

1. Farm puzzle
2. Firetruck puzzle
3. People of the world puzzle

I feel like Henry learns so many life lessons from such a simple activity. He learns persistence, patience, delayed gratification, the need to try different strategies when something isn't working, visual discrimination, hand-eye coordination, fine-motor skills--the list goes on! 

That's a little of what we've been up to around here! (And just hanging out outside.)

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Montessori Topponcino

I started this post a long time ago but never got around to finishing it during the newborn haze. Tate is now 10 months-old! Ten months ago, Henry was a toddler. He had the chubbiest cheeks and the sweetest toddler speak. Now he talks about astronauts and says things like "I'm up for the challenge" when I mention that he might want to switch his shoes to the proper feet. (As a side note I don't normally tell him to fix his shoes, but we were getting ready to do something that seemed safer with his shoes on the right way.)

But not too long ago, Tater was the tiniest infant (well, not so "tiny" at a whopping 10.3 pounds--but you get the point). During the first 6-8 weeks of his life, we used his Montessori topponcino all the time, and I meant to write a post to tell you about it. We never had one with Henry, but I definitely recommend it. The reason I decided to get it the second time around was that my Montessori-trained friend explained that it really helps younger children hold babies safely and comfortably. 

The idea behind the topponcino is that infants need to feel the most safe and secure during the first 6-8 weeks of their lives while they are first acclimating to the world outside the uterus. A topponcino helps provide that security as they get passed from person to person and get transferred from surface to surface. It always feels and smells the same. 

Although it has a relatively short lifespan in terms of "baby gear," it was immensely helpful during those first 6-8 weeks. I could breastfeed Tate on it and when he fell asleep I could transfer him to his bassinet more smoothly because he didn't experience any sort of change in temperature or texture. When it was play time, I would simply transfer it under his wooden arch. A friend of mine let me borrow several of her covers, so we would just change them out whenever he spit up (well, to be honest, we would first flip the spit up spot down toward his feet and then we would flip it over and do the same thing again, so that we could get four spit-ups out of one cover; we were tired parents acclimating to life with two--okay?).  

I purchased my topponcino from this Etsy shop.

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Montessori Moments

These "Montessori Moments" posts are meant to highlight some of the ways we implement the Montessori method in our home. Many of the activities that are featured--cooking, cleaning together, going out into nature, etc.--overlap with other parenting philosophies or might seem like things that parents just do with their children intuitively. I've still chosen to highlight them here because they are integral to the Montessori approach to parenting and education and fit within a comprehensive continuum of activities that support children as they undergo the important work of forming themselves. For more information about incorporating Montessori into the home, I recommend How to Raise an Amazing Child the Montessori Way for a basic overview. For more insight into Montessori as an educational philosophy, I recommend Montessori Today. When trying to implement Montessori with infants and toddlers, I recommend Montessori from the Start and Joyful Child, as well as my favorite resource, which is a DVD documentary of Montessori at home with a 20 month old called Edison's Day.

1) Cooking Eggs

I read Kylie's post about Caspar cooking eggs years ago. When Henry recently started showing signs of readiness, I figured we should give it a try. 

Henry has been cracking eggs for a while now, and he really enjoys doing all the prep work that goes into making scrambled eggs. He gets out the compost, whisk, and eggs. He cracks the eggs independently and whisks them. Around the time he turned 3, he started asking to help me cook them on the stove. I decided to skip the electric skillet because a) I didn't really want to purchase yet another appliance and b) Henry seems old enough to understand the severity of fire and heat (with close supervision). 

He pushes his learning tower over while I turn on the gas and butter the pan. I also pour the eggs into the pan. Then he uses his wooden spoon to push around the eggs until they are cooked. 

It reminds me of this article about why Montessorians introduce young children to needles, knives, and matches:

"All of this intention, attention, and precision gives the child knowledge of several things:

• S/he is trusted by the adults in his/her life;
• S/he is recognized by the adult as capable of keeping him/herself and others safe through his/her own self-discipline;
• S/he is trusted to remember and persevere in taking great care with a dangerous tool;
• The adult has confidence and faith in him/her;
• S/he can trust that when the adult says no, there must be a very strong reason because the adult has show respect by giving him/her dangerous tools to be used with great care and shown him/her how to use them;
• The adult will always do the very best to respect his/her desire to learn and do if it can possible be made safe;
• S/he can use dangerous tools to carry out dangerous tasks because s/he has skill and intention."

2) Real Glass

As I mentioned in this post, Tate is eating food now and drinking out of a real glass. In Montessori, we avoid using sippy cups. As the Michael Olaf website explains, "A cup with a top that prevents spills interrupts the natural development of the child's control of movement, and the development of skills of observation and logical consequence." 

It's such a tiny thing that makes so much sense to me. Henry started using glass from the age of four months, and he quickly learned how to hold the glass for himself and take great care with real glass because it can spill and break. 

3) The Weaning Table

I wrote about setting up the weaning table for Henry several years ago. Now it's Tate's turn! He uses it for any meal that we're not eating together as a family. When we're eating together as a family, he pulls right up to the table in his Tripp-Trapp high chair. 

Although the learning tower, weaning table, and Tripp Trapp were all expensive investments, they have been so incredibly useful for several years. Further, all of them are holding up extremely well, and I imagine it will be easy to recoup much of our investment by reselling the learning tower and high chair on Craigslist when we no longer need them. 

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Update on the Montessori Floor Bed

On Sunday morning, Tate woke up, crawled to his shelf, pulled up, and began rummaging through a little wooden box with toys in it. It gave me the idea that now might be a good time to give an update about the Montessori floor bed since we've used it through two infants and are still using it with our toddler (is three the official end of toddlerhood?). 

Using a floor bed is similar to using a crib, except that the entire room becomes a crib. For both Henry and Tate, we used a crib mattress (a three-inch one from IKEA) and placed it in the middle of the floor on a soft rug for bedtime and naps. In Henry's first room, we moved it back to the corner every day; in Tate's room we simply leave it in the middle of the rug all the time. 

The Montessori books recommend placing the floor mattress in the corner because infants like the feeling of being more closed in, but it's always felt safer to us to not have it against the wall. 

The first reason I love the Montessori floor bed is the cost. It's much cheaper to buy a crib mattress than an entire crib. But more than the cost factor, I love what it communicates to even the youngest baby. It communicates that they have the freedom to explore their surroundings on their own terms. It also gives them an uninterrupted view of the room, as opposed to seeing it through slats. 

I also love that we never had to go through any huge transition to a "big boy bed." We did upgrade to a regular twin-sized mattress, but we didn't have to put up any bars to prevent Henry from rolling off. And now when we sleep in hotels, he can easily sleep on regular-sized beds when he needs to. 

I completely understand why people don't go this route (and I even know trained Montessorians who choose to go the crib route), but I just wanted to share my perspective about how well it's worked for both boys. It's definitely not a mainstream choice, but it has felt like the right one for our family.

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Montessori Practical Life

Henry has definitely undergone the shift that happens in development between 0-3 years-old and 3-6 years-old. It's fascinating to watch him grow! 

After a conference with each teacher, I realized that I've been over-nurturing certain aspects of his development and unintentionally treating him more like a 6-9 year-old. Matt and I are both Montessori trained in 6-9, so that's where we're more comfortable. For example, Henry has shown interest in "doing research," like wanting to learn more about motorized para-gliders after we saw one on a hike (they are fascinating!) and wanting to research whether or not it's developmentally appropriate for him to get a pedal bike. 

The conference with his teacher reminded me of the importance of good ol' Practical Life for young children (and all children but especially the little ones!). I'd like to set some goals for myself around how to encourage more practical life within our home. As always, when I'm trying to make a change in my life, I have to visualize exactly what I want to see myself doing and--most importantly--when I want to do it:

1. When Matt is playing soccer on Sunday, that's the optimal time for Henry and me to do some work together, especially when Tate is napping. I ordered him a child-sized broom, so we can sweep the front and back deck together. We can also sweep the driveway and sidewalk. 
2. Another other time for us to do practical life together would be after school. I cut a sponge in half so we can clean his table, his learning tower, and the high chairs together. 
3. I'd like to be really intentional about cooking dinner with Henry at least once a week. He definitely helps out with chopping, etc., but I find myself relieved when he's engaged in independent play and I can hurry and cook by myself. I'm going to commit to cooking with him from start to finish (including dishes!) at least once a week.
4. I ordered these beautiful placemats from Kylie, so we can have more of a process around setting the table for dinner. I also ordered this apron and this apron from my friend Karla for cooking/baking and dishwashing.
5. I also think we need to slow down the evening process, so that Henry can be more involved with clearing the table and putting away his toys at the end of the day. Right now, Matt shuttles Henry and Tate into the bath right after dinner while I do all the cleaning. I think we should push his bedtime back a little later to make time for these important steps.

I need to go back and watch Edison's Day for the 40th time. It's so grounding and beautiful. It helps me rethink what is possible for young children.

Image courtesy of How We Montessori Shop

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Montessori Bar and Mirror

At the six-month mark, Tate began trying to pull up on things, and we knew it was time to install the Montessori bar on our mirror. The bar is installed at chest-height for the baby, which I think is approximately 17 inches. The baby uses it to pull up into a standing position and later practice cruising. 

We had a neighborhood handyman install it the first time, but it pulled right out of the wall! The next time we asked our friend to do it. At our little New Year's Reflection and Resolution-setting party, my friend and I decided that her husband would install our white board and railing for Tate, if we taught her how to cook a soup and had her and her family over for dinner. 

He decided to install it into the wood frame of the mirror because the spacing of the studs was a little off. Installing it onto the frame of the mirror meant that he had to saw a little of the bar off, which seemed to be pretty simple for him. 

The bar is simply a curtain rod from IKEA. You could also think about using some hand railing material from a home improvement store like Home Depot or Lowe's. 

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The Magic of Montessori Movement

There are aspects of the Montessori philosophy that make parenting more difficult. For example, I think it would be much easier to plop Tate into one of those baby exersaucers. 

Instead, I always try to put him on the ground during his awake time. I try not to put him into positions that he couldn't get into himself (e.g., no bumbo seats to support him in a seated position before he is actually sitting). His first activity was lying on his back watching visual mobiles, like the whales and butterflies, or going on his stomach to look at black-and-white books.

Once he started reaching for the mobiles hanging above him, I switched to things he could bat at: a puzzle ball, a bell, etc. hung under an arch toy hanger. 

Once he started grabbing at the objects dangling in front of him, I switched to a wooden ring and other toys that he can grab and interact with. 

At three months, he started rolling over onto his stomach, so then I started putting out objects that he could reach for, and scoot toward, like the bell and ball cylinders. Once he touches them, they roll slightly and encourage him to scoot toward them again. 

By the end of four months, he was able to army crawl his way toward anything. Now at five months, he is getting up on all fours and giving indication that he is eager to start pulling himself up on things. I look at this little being with utter and complete amazement. 

I've done my best to observe him and prepare the physical environment in a way that supports his development and then I've stepped aside to let him do his thing. What he's taught himself to do in four short months is nothing short of amazing. As I marvel at what he can do, I'm not excited that he's reaching "milestones" early. That's not it at all. Instead, I am excited about what he is learning. By being provided with freedom of movement from day one that allows the full development of his muscles and motion (no swings, no infant seats, etc.), he is learning that he can exert his will within the world toward a specific end. At five months, he is learning that he has control over his own body and he can direct it to accomplish his own ends. 

And that lesson, to me, is the foundation for the healthiest kind of self-esteem. It's a sense of self that doesn't come from others' praise or even their love. It is not dependent upon anything external. And the point of that kind of independence is not separation from those around him. After he moves from dependence to independence, then he can move toward interdependence. The separation then helps him form even healthier attachments.

This blog post over at Janet Lansbury talks about this same idea in a different way. A mother wrote in with her worry about the fact that her child wasn't learning how to sit as early as his friends. But then she realized:

But then as we watched the babies, my boy flipped onto his tummy and proceeded to circle around the floor, grabbing any toys that caught his fancy, exploring and discovering. The other two babies just sat there playing with the toys their mothers handed them. The striking thing was that they didn’t even reach for new toys. Maybe they had learned already that if they tried to reach something they would just fall over. Or perhaps the thought of reaching for something they wanted hadn’t even occurred to them, since their mothers always handed them toys.

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An Infant Montessori Environment

When I was pregnant with Henry, I started getting his Montessori nursery ready several months in advance. This time around, we didn't create a nursery for Tate at all.

 

In this particular instance, it's not a case of busy-second-time-momness. Really, it was simply a function of the fact that we were scheduled to move into our new house two weeks after his birth.

 

And then the builders tacked on a few more weeks until our house was going to be finalized and two weeks at our rental house with baby Tate started to turn into a month or more. While he still didn't need a full-blown nursery for a single month (since he sleeps in our room), he definitely needed more space dedicated to his needs throughout the house.

 

So here's a quick tour of the ways in which we've made space for Baby Tate in our home:

 

In our office/guest room, I set up a large mirror against the wall and pushed a crib mattress against it. I screwed a hook into the ceiling, so that I could hang mobiles from it. This space is perfect for working on blog posts at the desk while Tate watches his mobiles. Right now, I have the Munari mobile set up in here, but when he tires of it, I can put up the whale mobile, the butterfly mobile, or an abstract mobile.

 

We have a portable set-up that can travel with us to any room, and we mainly use it in the family room. We have a mat for Tate to lie on or we simply use his topponcino. He can either lie on his back underneath this wooden arch (I made black and white cards for him to look at) or he can lie on his stomach and look at this black-and-white accordion book. I like that the mat and arch can be stowed in a closet when not in use. It helps keep the cluttered feeling at bay.

 

In our bedroom, we have a mobile hanging above our bed (that can be raised out of the way when not in use). We also have a Moses basket that we use for napping and nighttime sleeping.

Tate gets lots of cuddle time while breastfeeding and while being put to sleep in the Moby wrap (once he falls asleep, we transition him to his Moses basket). During his brief moments of awake time, we try to give him as much freedom of movement as possible. We try to keep him out of confining contraptions as much as possible (e.g., no swings, infant seats, etc.) and instead let him lie on his stomach or back on a flat surface to give him the greatest range of motion to move his arms, legs, and head.

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