Some Good News and Bad News

I finally made an appointment to hear the results from my food sensitivity testing. I'll admit: ignorance was bliss. I honestly didn't want to know. If I knew that something was causing an immune response in my body, then I would have to do something about it. 

The good news is that my test was pretty clear. Nothing was in the 4 or higher range. The things that got the highest were milk, whey, and brewers' yeast. 

On the other hand, Matt's results were terrible. He is sensitive to most of the staples of an American diet, including many different forms of gluten and dairy. 

I know lots of people are skeptical about the validity of this kind of testing, but we are four for four when it comes to results matching up to issues. Matt has lots of stomach sensitivity, so his diagnosis makes sense. Tate's sensitivities match up to his eczema issues, and Henry's gluten issue matches up to his self-regulation issues. It's been an interesting journey for us! 

I'm honestly not sure what the future holds for our how we are going to meet our dietary needs. For a while I tried eating meat through our Sunbasket meals, but I just couldn't stomach it. Then I started pulling together really fast meals for the boys (pre-prepared meat, frozen peas, and applesauce) while Matt and I went back to the vegetarian Sunbasket meals (our favorite). But now that doesn't work for Matt. 

We'll see what we do!

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My Life Work: Genetic Testing, Therapy, Etc.

At the end of the year, I want to be able to say that I feel balanced, connected, full of vitality, and at peace. I want to make sure my own bucket is full so I can interact with others from a place of patience, love, and joy. 

To work toward that end, I've started working with a leadership coach every other week. I'm also about to start working with a therapist on the alternate weeks. I'm going to do it via Skype so I don't feel like I have one more commitment outside of the home. 

Through my work so far, I'm learning how I have to be more intentional and vigilant about prioritization in my life. I'm also learning about how to use my strengths to grow in the areas I want to grow, instead of constantly focusing on the things that need to change. 

I'm also seeing the need to develop a self-compassion practice. 

I'm also getting genetic testing through 23andme. I'm going to submit the raw data via this website to get a fuller report. If I have an MTHFR mutation that means I would benefit from prescription folic acid, then I'm going to start taking that. There's a history of anxiety and depression in my family. While I don't feel like I have the symptoms of depression, I do wonder if my constant "striving" is connected to anxiety. 

And--as if this list weren't already long enough--I'm going to get the results of my food insensitivity testing this week. I really do believe that the body is a complex system and things like nutrition have a huge impact on our brain. 

As I write all of this, I'm aware of how crazy I sound. Honestly, I'm feeling balanced, full of vitality, and at peace right now! And it's because I'm doing this work. I feel good when I feel like I'm growing and evolving as a person. I know, though, that my striving needs to be tempered with self-compassion and appreciation. I'm excited to be on this journey called Life!

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Happy Birthday, Sweet Henry!

Oh, Henry. You add so much to our lives. We are so incredibly grateful for everything you bring to our family. 

You've grown so much as a kindergartener this year. You wake yourself up, get dressed, and make your breakfast. You help Tate all the time. 

You are constantly generating ideas: like the time you wanted to go to Terra Toys to buy stuff so you hatched a plan to raise money with a pecan stand. I came home and saw you standing at the corner with Dad and Tate, holding a sign that read "Pecans." You made $11 and bought yourself (and Tate) several toys. You are a generous person. 

You like to use screwdrivers to take things apart. You like to use string to put things together. You like to flip over chairs and stack up couch cushions to invent all sorts of things. You have never once in your life said, "I'm bored." 

You know how to read and write in cursive. You continue to be a phenomenal swimmer. You love the water! You love adventures--going to new places. This year we went to Flagstaff for Spring Break, the San Juan Islands for Summer Break, and Los Angeles for Fall Break. 

And you love having friends over. You continue to love eating meat, and you talk frequently about things like hunting, guns, and archery. You're getting better and better at aikido every week, and you started playing soccer during the after care program at school. 

You care deeply about other people. When we went shopping for birthday presents for twin girls, you knew which one would want a dog toy and which one would want a cat toy. Your gifts were their favorite. You knew exactly what they would like. When one of the little girls was sick, you wanted to make her a card and give her a dollar bill. I suggested that we make her something instead, and you said, "She really just wants money." You pay attention to others, and you read them well. 

You love to hear make-believe stories about pirates attacking a ship you're on and me coming to your rescue in a helicopter. We then travel to the island of our dreams and spend our days eating mangoes. We still cuddle together every night and almost every morning. We love to wrestle as a family. You and I are on the same team against Dad. You are a master at tickling. You can maneuver your body very quickly and get your small hands in all the right places. 

You bring so much joy, creativity, and curiosity into our family. Thank you for sharing your light with us and making our lives brighter. 

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It's Time for a Change

Now that we are using Sunbasket for three meals a week, I hardly ever have leftovers for lunch. I've been resorting to grabbing a protein bar and a piece of fruit. That was bad enough. Then I stopped having time to make my green smoothies for breakfast and starting grabbing the same kind of protein bar for breakfast. What?!?

I have to stop. I need more veggies and more fiber. Enter the work day salad...

Inspired by Kelsey, I am going to start making a work day salad the night before. Here's what I'm aiming for:

• Crunchy lettuce
• Farro
• Boiled egg
• Peas
• Carrots
• Cucumber
• Red pepper

I'm going to try her strategy of salad dressing at the bottom, then grain. I'm excited! 

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Camping-Themed Birthday Party

I have to confess that I feel like a huge hypocrite when it comes to planning my children's birthday parties. I'm so judgmental of all the birthday parties I see on Pinterest. I have thoughts like, "Is all that attention to detail really for the children or is it for the adults? Whom are you trying to impress? Doesn't that bring more stress than joy into your life? And how much does it cost to buy color-coordinated straws?" 

And then when my son's birthday parties come around, I revel in the planning and in the details. I like planning! And I like details! (Maybe all those Pinterest moms do, too).

Now that Henry is older, we have so much fun planning together. He's turning 6 this year, and we are going with a camping-themed birthday party. Here's what we've got planned:

1. Playing in tents set up around the backyard (we have one real one and one toy tent)
2. Cooking hot dogs over a real fire
3. Then cooking S'mores (with gluten-free graham crackers and vegan chocolate, due to all the food sensitivities in our life right now)
4. Fishing in our pool (we bought these fish as favors, and our plan is to glue magnets onto them and make bamboo fishing poles using the bamboo in our backyard)
5. Swatting at a camping-themed piñata (Henry wanted to make a gun; I talked him into a tent)

I'm excited to do an inexpensive party at home for another year. It's getting harder and harder as Henry gets invited to more and more birthday parties at jump houses, etc. 

We're looking forward to it!

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Making Babies

What better topic for Valentine's Day, right? 

I came across this book for the first time last week, and I'm intrigued to read it. It's called Brighton Baby: The Complete Guide to Preconception & Conception. 

It "celebrates the power of love as the intangible 'blueprint of life.'"

No, this does not mean that we are planning for Number Three. Life is perfectly full (and hard) with just two of them! I'm continuing to host my e-course about preparing your mind, body, and life for pregnancy, so I like to stay current on what's happening with the research. 

The book looks dense (a little too dense), but here's what I find intriguing about it:

Throughout the book, Dr. Dittmann turns the spotlight on the hidden dangers of: heavy metals and other toxins, genetically modified foods, pesticides, artificial sweeteners, rancid oils, antibiotics, processed foods, contaminated drinking water, electrosmog, and the pluses & minuses of vaccines - merging science and common sense to compel couples to take action today to prevent birth defects in their future child. Brighton Baby is a call to action for couples to commit now to consciously preparing for your future child together."

I worry a lot about the increasing toxicity of our world and the increase in disorders affecting children (from the perspective of an educator). I look forward to checking out [the less expensive, Kindle version of] this book!

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On Turning 39

Last week marked my passage across the threshold of being 39. I had a wonderful day that was celebrated by my children (Henry made me a "wind-powered boat" out of a shoebox, a pinwheel, and  duct tape, as well as four cards, so Tate started finding toys all around the house and giving them to me as gifts as you can see above), my colleagues, the children I tutor, my birthday buddy (we do a little exchange at school every year), and my partner Matt (he had warm cookies and cold milk delivered to me at work and wrote a poem for me).

The tenor of my birthdays is very different now that my life is so full. I used to pour my energy for creation and planning into my birthday parties, whether they involved random acts of kindness scavenger hunts or retro proms or trips to a YMCA camp for the weekend with a big group of friends. My desire to create and plan is reduced because I've just got so much going on in my life, and what's left of it goes into Henry's birthday, which is in the same month as mine. 

I'm working on bringing more balance into my life by trying to stop working by 8:00pm every night. We'll see if I have renewed energy and creativity to plan my birthday next year! Plus, it's #40, so maybe I'll want to do something bigger.

Regardless, birthdays are always a good time to step back and reflect and make sure we are living our  lives to the fullest. I'm watching a pretty dumb show right now ("No Tomorrow" on Netflix) about a man who believes a meteor is barreling toward the Earth. He's using his eight months to really live his life to the fullest (he has an "apocalist" of all the things he wants to do before he dies). 

It's funny to me that I am such a list person and yet the idea of a "bucket list" has never really taken off in my life. I'm not sure why that is. I wonder if it's because my list has been more around these lines:

• Marry an amazing life partner
• Give birth to children
• Build a family life that is full of connection, quality time, adventure, joy, and love
• Live in a beautiful space that makes my soul soar on a daily basis
• Find a job that I love that helps bring about a world where there is "liberty and justice for all"

That's been my bucket list, or my Life List. And I've managed to bring these things into my life. (I'm frantically trying to knock on wood all over the house because I know that the things that matter to me most--my partner and my children--are tenuous. Their existence is not a given. Anything could happen at any moment and turn my life upside-down.)

If I died now (again--knocking on wood all over the place!), I would die in a contended place, knowing that I was able to do all the things I really wanted to do.

So maybe it is time to make more of an adventure-based list? I'll have to ruminate on that one for a while. 

For now, I'm going to focus on the gratitude I have for the life that is right in front of me. 

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