Maternity Guest Post: Thoughts on Living Car-Free with a Child

By Sarah Kay

My husband Henry and I are wrapping up our first year as parents and our fourth year without a car. We sold our car--my beloved "Rocketstar"--back when we lived in Oregon and could easily bike and walk everywhere we needed to go. Two years and two states later, we were living in Austin when we found out we were expecting our first child, HP.

Upon hearing the pregnancy news, well-meaning friends and family often asked us some version of the following: You're going to have to get a car now that you're having a baby, right? We responded that we hoped to continue our car-free lifestyle with the new addition, but if necessary, we would reevaluate once our son arrived. We do not live without a car to make our lives more difficult--it is something we enjoy, so we did not want to preemptively abandon our car-free ways before trying to make it work as a family of three.

Here we are, a year into parenthood, with five bikes and zero cars in our garage. Saying the past year has been challenging is an understatement. I could blame those challenges on our lack of car ownership, but I am not sure that is fair or accurate. Figuring out who we are as parents and meeting the needs of an infant is hard--with or without a motor vehicle. There were times that I felt isolated in my new role as a mother, and while not having a car did not cause those feelings, it intensified them when they came. 

My husband's month of paternity leave ended in July and he biked off each day to the world of adults while I stayed at home with the tiny human being we created. It took less than a week on my own to start Googling "biking with a newborn." I was desperate to get out.

Frantic internet searches aside, we decided not to bike with HP until he was at least nine months old.  Until then, we would travel by bus or foot. The prospect of riding the bus with my newborn son terrified me for the first month of his life. What if he needs to nurse? What if I need to change him?  What if he cries? Once I mustered up the courage and just did it, I realized my worries were unfounded. HP loves being on the bus. He likes the motion, being snuggled in his carrier, and observing fellow passengers or the scenery out the window. A handful of meltdowns aside, he has been an excellent bus rider.

We (mostly) happily bused around town for the first eleven months of HP's life. Ninety percent of our busing experiences were positive, the other ten percent tested my patience and resolve. At various points I cursed buses for being early, buses for being late, the lack of shade at the stops, erratic drivers, irritating riders, and most often, Henry and myself for deciding it was a good idea to continue living without a car. In those moments I tried to put my frustration in perspective and remind myself that this season of exclusive bus riding was a small piece of our lives and soon we would be back to our preferred mode of transportation--cycling. 

In May, we made the much anticipated switch to bicycles. It is no exaggeration to say that biking with HP has revolutionized my life. We are no longer at the mercy of the bus schedule or routes and it feels fantastic. Biking = freedom.

Now that we are happily cruising Austin's roadways on our bicycles, I could romanticize the past year and gloss over the challenges of being car-free with an infant. Let me be clear: there were moments of frustration when I thought we would not see it through. But most of the time? We were just living our life and raising our kid. A year later, I can honestly say that I am glad we stuck it out and made it work for our family.

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Sarah writes about parenting, gardening, and her family's adventures biking in Texas at Affirmaison

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