Recipe: Roasted Vegetables + Chickpeas

Photo courtesy Better Homes and Gardens

Henry has gotten to the point where he knows the difference between his pureed foods and the food we're eating, and he prefers the latter. So now we try to cook foods that he can eat right alongside us (just in smaller bites).

This recipe for roasted vegetables and chickpeas is delicious! It was easy, tasty, healthy, and inexpensive, which is exactly my kind of recipe.

We still feed Henry at his Montessori weaning table for breakfast and lunch, and he still joins us for dinner in his high chair pulled up to the table. The only difference now is that I mainly feed him what I'm eating: vegetarian chili, quinoa with butternut squash, black-eyed peas, vegetarian pizza, cheese quesadillas, black beans and rice, sauteed spinach--the kid sure does love to eat!

My hope is that by exposing him to lots of different flavors and tastes while he's really young, we'll get him accustomed to eating normal food and we won't have to get into the habit of making something separate for him, like peanut butter and jelly (although I know it's easier said than done!).

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UPDATE: The next Purposeful Conception Course: Preparing Your Mind, Body, and Life for Pregnancy starts on November 13. Register today! We'd love to have you join us!

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A Breastfeeding Retrospective

I always knew that I wanted to breastfeed Henry, if it was possible. Of course there are the health benefits (both for the mother and the baby), but I honestly skipped over most of those chapters in my pregnancy, birth, and breast feeding books because I didn't need convincing. Breastfeeding just felt like one of the most natural, simple, and pure processes imaginable.

Although I still think it's one of the most natural, simple, and pure processes around, I also understand the less romantic aspects of it, too.

While I was pregnant, I did a lot of research about breastfeeding. I read books, rented DVDs, went to classes, attended a La Leche League meeting and took lessons from my friends (yes, for real). I still feel like all of that research gave me a solid foundation. And, honestly, I wish I would have done a little more (for example, I didn't learn anything about pumping or storing breast milk). I learned all about the importance of the latch, different holds, possible complications, etc.

Breastfeeding got off to a great start, once we got home from the hospital (after I transferred during my home birth) and my milk came in. I didn't have any engorgement or nipple tenderness. A week later, I was counting my lucky stars that my nipples still weren't tender. My midwife kept saying that if I could make it past the first week, I would be set.

However, at about the week mark, I started having difficulty. First, it was a plugged duct that I had to prevent from turning into mastitis. Then it was extreme nipple tenderness. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't keep Henry's mouth open and wide; he just wanted to suck on the very tip. Every time I would break the suction and re-latch him, I would be subjected to shooting pain that came at the start of every latch. To make matters worse, Henry wanted to eat for looooooong stretches of time. One day, he ate for a total of nine hours. Because I needed both hands (one to keep his chin down and the other to keep him close), I basically couldn't do anything except watch movies on Netflix (since we don't have a TV). I did try listening to an audio book, but it was boring and I didn't bother getting a different one. In the middle of the night, I needed to turn a light on to see what I was doing. The first week or two, I had to wake Matt up to help me get Henry latched on.

And my nipples were sore all the time. Drying off with a towel or putting on a bra was no fun at all. I kept asking the women from my prenatal yoga class, "When does the pain with latching go away? When will my nipples stop being so sore?" They said 3-4 weeks.

Well, 3-4 weeks came and went and I watched breast feeding get easier and easier for my friends. I had to use My Brest Friend religiously to position Henry right, and I still needed two hands (I prefer this pillow to the Boppy because it can latch behind your back and stay in place more easily; it just depends on personal preference.). They had one hand (or both!) free and looked as comfortable as could be. I finally switched from cloth breast pads to disposable ones, which definitely felt better on my sore nipples.

I went back to the hospital to visit the lactation consultant again. She answered some of my questions and gave me some advice (like just put lanolin on the protruding part of the nipple, not on the entire areola, so that the baby's mouth doesn't slip). I continued to get plugged ducts left and right.

I remember crying a lot. I really wanted to continue breastfeeding, but it felt like so much struggle and sacrifice. I was the only one who could feed Henry in the night (since I hated pumping). Matt couldn't do anything to relieve me of the constant responsibility of feeding my son eight times a day. Thankfully, I persevered to the 6-week mark when things got a lot better. My soreness decreased and the positioning got easier.

At three months, things really got better. Henry suddenly started eating much, much faster, and I was able to free up one of my hands. I stopped having to lug My Brest Friend around with me everywhere.

Now, I'm so, so thankful I persevered through the difficult times. They seem so distant. Even trying to write this post is a struggle because my mind is blurring out the difficult details.

In terms of some practical issues, I still highly recommend this bra. If I had known about it earlier, I would have worn it through my pregnancy (especially because the sizes are only S, M, L, and XL). As far as nursing tops go, I decided not to spend any money on specialized clothing. I tried to stick to tops that could be unbuttoned. I used this shield to cover up in public (which was hot and annoying but sometimes necessary).

Now that I'm more comfortable with everything, it's much easier to breastfeed in public by nestling into a chair and lifting up my shirt. I wish I loved nursing tanks, so that my stomach would be covered, but I find that Henry's body does a decent job of keeping me shielded. Nursing tanks just don't feel comfortable to me.

Despite the difficulties I've had (though not as many difficulties as others), I'm so thankful for my ability to nourish my son. It's amazing to see another human grow and thrive, simply by feasting on something your own body produces.

In the hard moments, I try to remember these things:

• My midwife said that babies are growing and changing so much in those first few weeks. Even if something is hard, it is likely to change very quickly as the baby matures (which has been true of Henry's latch and his sensitivity to cow's milk protein in my body).
  
• Before I know it, Henry is going to be driving a car. These days go so fast, and I should try my very best to savor them and focus on the positive.
  

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November: Reflection & Rejuvenation

From the Nikki McClure Calendar

And, with that, the year is almost over. Golly gee whiz! That was fast. Pretty soon, it will be time to set intentions for the new year. Before I do that, I better think about finishing my intentions for this year!

(As a process note, that's part of how I generate my intentions for each month. I look back at my intentions for the whole year and pick and choose things to tackle each month.)

So, I'm kind of scared to look back at October. But that's why I do this, right? It increases my accountability to myself.

Here we go:

• Be the best mother and teacher I can be for my son, Henry. I have to remember that all the time and energy I put into parenting now is an investment in our future together. Yep! I'm doing my best!
  
• Go to a pumpkin patch! Check!
  
• Make homemade Halloween costumes for Henry and me. I did pull together Henry's costume (kind of; I didn't make a collar or a tail to go with his Hoss costume), although I decided that I didn't want to dress up this year. We don't have any party plans, and I am in serious save-money mode.
  
• Bake pumpkin seeds. Yes!
  
• Plan spring break. Still struggling with this one (see my previous point about being in "serious save-money mode").
  
• Put forth a concerted effort to find people for the Austin Pocket Neighborhood. Yes! I attended a potluck for people interested in co-housing.
  
• Plan Montessori For All website and then find someone to design it. Still waiting on the graphic designer to finish the logo, although Kelly gave me a good lead on a website designer.
  
• Start Henry's 529. Ugh. I still can't figure out if it makes sense to set one of these up or if it makes sense to just save in other ways.
  
• Start recruiting a Board of Directors for Montessori For All. Yes! I sent out approximately 40 e-mails and got a good response. Now we just need to move to Austin, so I can meet with people in person!
  
• Practice Spanish! No, I am not doing this. There is such a gap between my desires and my actions when it comes to this! I need to come up with a routine that I can implement every day.
  
• Make serious progress on my book about how to have a meaningful and memorable wedding without losing your savings or sanity. No! And it's due January 1! Aack!

So with that uninspiring round-up, let's see what I have in store for this month!

• Be the best mother and teacher I can be for my son, Henry. I have to remember that all the time and energy I put into parenting now is an investment in our future together. Is there anything I want to focus on in particular? Perhaps getting him to fall asleep independently for naps? (He goes to sleep by himself at night but, during the day, I have to lie next to him and apply pressure to his back so he doesn't crawl off his floor bed and start playing.)
  
• Plan spring break.
• Plan Montessori For All website.
• Make serious progress on my book about how to have a meaningful and memorable wedding without losing your savings or sanity. This is no joke. I really need to do this.
  
• Make and send Thanksgiving cards. Do I really want to do this? Yes and no. It's an awesome sentiment and yearly routine, but I just don't think I can pull it off this year. So scratch that one. I have too much else going on. How about I start getting Christmas presents ready instead?
• Plan and present a workshop for the Texas Charter Schools Association conference.
• Help Matt plan an awesome birthday party (we're hosting a 1980s Slumber Party, complete with pizza, junk food, episodes of Saved by the Bell, facials, games, etc.).
  
• Prepare a nice present for Matt's birthday.
• Make something delicious to bring to my friend's house for Thanksgiving dinner.
  

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Budget Schmudget

Vintage piggy bank from Etsy

Living on one income is no fun at all (I apologize to those of you who are living on no income; I can only begin to imagine how whiny I sound!). Although Henry pays me daily with smiles and coos, we're still hemorrhaging money.

We'll it's not as bad as it sounds. We have money in savings that we can use to cover our expenses while I'm on maternity leave and work to start a public Montessori charter school, but we don't really want to spend that money, since we also want to build a house in a pocket neighborhood.

Hmm...I'm realizing that I need to do more thinking about what I'm doing right now, what I enjoy doing, and what I want to be doing to figure out how to generate more revenue in those areas.

In the meantime, Matt and I need to go back into budget mode. Back in 2008, we were able to plan a super-budget wedding and save five digits for a down payment on our house. It was stressful (like imagine us pulling up to the bank in Houston in our U-Haul truck from Denver 45 minutes before our closing meeting at the title company, depositing our wedding gift checks, and withdrawing just barely enough money to pay for our house). But we got it done.

Over the years, we've had many different versions of a budget. When we're making a lot of money (well, for two people who work in the non-profit sector!), we try to deposit a lot of money in our Roth IRA for retirement. We also set aside a lot of money for travel and then go on fun, fun vacations (like a sailing trip around the Greek Islands).

When we're pinching pennies, I keep track of every single purchase and make us pay for dinner out of our personal allowances when we've already spent all our grocery money for the month.

I feel like we need to get back into Pinching Pennies Mode.

Here's the plan:

1. I read through every budget category and updated it by looking at our most recent payments. For example, our car insurance has gone up since the last time I did our budget, so I changed that number. Also, we gave up our Netflix account, so I changed that row to $0.
   
2. I added some of the rows together to figure out our "spending money" for the month. Those rows include groceries, eating out, entertainment, and some miscellaneous expenses.
   
3. I'm going to enter that number into an app on my iPhone called Spend Free (thankfully, that app didn't cost me anything!).
   
4. Every time Matt and I eat out, buy groceries, order something off Amazon, etc., I'm going to subtract the cost from our budget for the month. That way, we can make more conscious choices about how we're spending our money.

For example, our preferred grocery store is Whole Foods, but if we're running out of money, then we need to make a different choice. Also, Matt is addicted to a new frozen yogurt store in our neighborhood (confession: I'm more than happy to tag along!), so we need to be more aware of how much we're spending there each month.

We could use something like Mint.com to track our spending more automatically and analyze it more deeply, but, at this point, I'm happy with the budget and then our concrete number that tells me what we can spend each month on all the major things we purchase: groceries, meals out, entertainment, and random things on Amazon.

I'm looking forward to getting back on track!

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Happy, Happy Halloween!

Phew! Henry's first Halloween ended up being fun after all.

For a while there, I was a bit depressed that I went out of my way to dress him up as his favorite thing (his bloodhound brother, Hoss) and he wasn't cooperating. Every time I put his bloodhound hat on (thank you, Lilly!) he would pull it right off, even when the chin strap was secured.

Even at the beginning of the day I figured it was futile to try and dress him up at all. I didn't make him a collar or a tail, and I didn't bother finding a brown outfit to perfectly match his hat.

Plus, we didn't have any plans at all, which gave me little to no motivation to come up with Plan B.

And then, at about 3pm, we suddenly had not one but two parties to go to. I was inspired to make caramel popcorn in cute bags and to make Henry's costume work. In a brief moment of inspiration, I decided to throw Hoss's collar into the wash. When Henry woke up from his nap, I put the collar around his neck, which was a h-u-g-e distraction and fun form of entertainment. I was then able to slip the hat on without the slightest hint of agitation!

I dug into our costume box and dressed like Rainbow Brite for the first party and a picnic for the second party.

And just like that, we had a fantastic Halloween.

I hope you and yours had a great time, too!

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Eight Months: Happy Birthday, Henry!

Henry! You are growing and changing so much.

This month as been all about crawling. You army crawled from 5-7 months, and from 7-8 months you figured out it was faster to get up on all fours. You go especially fast when you're headed toward something you aren't supposed to reach, like the toilet or Hoss's bowls. You've also figured out how to pull open doors, so you love letting yourself out of your room when you wake up.

You're still pulling up on everything. Luckily, you've figured out how to get down really easily (although you still bonk your head occasionally). You move from crawling to sitting and back to crawling really easily. You just started pivoting from one piece of furniture to another (like turning from the couch to the coffee table). I love when you pull up on the sill and look out the front window. You love to climb in the refrigerator. You even reached in the drawer and pulled out a carrot for yourself.

Speaking of eating, you are obsessed with everything. Today we ate vegetarian chili together for lunch. You always want more, more, more.

We have more and more fun together with each passing month. You play with me by crawling toward me with an open mouth and collapsing on my face. We laugh and laugh.

Halloween is right around the corner. You have a lovely knitted Hoss hat, but you hate wearing it. Sigh. I hope to teach you how fun it is to leave the hat on and suck on the ears before Halloween gets here.

This month, your Montessori guide said that you were "such a Montessori baby." She explained that you are confident, observant, and comfortable moving all around to get what you want. And the people at Whole Foods love you. You smile at everyone and anyone. You especially love when they have apple samples at the front entrance.

Oh, Henry Jones, we feel such immense gratitude for the fact that you have come to us safely and that you continue to thrive. We are doing our very best to be the kind of parents you deserve. We love you with our whole hearts.

Until next month...

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Montessori Movement: Crawling to Walking

Reading Carrie's posts the past two days makes me marvel at the magic of infancy to toddlerhood. I know I sound cheesy, but I mean it! It's simply amazing to watch a being go from a supine, completely-dependent position to an independent being who can walk. In the past eight months, Henry has gone from lying on his back watching mobiles to pulling himself up on anything and everything (including pumpkins!).

For me, nurturing his movement is not about helping him advance faster than the other babies or reach the important milestones early so I can brag on Facebook (although I do, from time to time). It's about creating the most optimal space for the development of his self.

At the end of this post, Carrie explains that the child who progresses from crawling to walking "will be filled with self-confidence and a new eagerness to explore [the] world!" That's exactly what I want for Henry. I want him to feel competent, confident, and excited to constantly explore, learn, and grow. As a mother, I feel incredibly empowered when I learn as much as I can about how to nurture his natural development by paying close attention to how he's changing and what he needs, preparing the environment to meet his needs, and then stepping back to provide the right balance between challenge and support.

Enough yammering from me! Thank your for this thought-provoking and informative post, Carrie!

Crawling is such an important step in both the physical and emotional development of children: as the baby crawls around, her self-confidence grows as she deepens her understanding that she is a capable human being. She knows what she wants and she knows how to get there. She delights in discovering her world, building knowledge as she touches and manipulates new objects. We delight in watching her.

To aid in the development of movement it is important to provide stimulus for movement, clothing that does not impede movement, and time for repetition and concentration. Saying this, we must also become aware of the importance of the internal development that is occurring. The development of the nervous system and the process of myelination greatly impact the child's development of coordinated movement. Myelin is the fatty substance that allows information to be transmitted through the axons of the neurons. Without sufficient myelin, the message from the brain instructing the limbs to move does not get properly transmitted. The rate of myelination depends on an individual child's development, which we are unable to influence other than to ensure she is receiving proper nutrition, with specific attention being paid to fats and protein.

The process of myelination starts in the brain and the centre of the body, and works its way to the toes and finger tips. If we look at a child's development of coordinated movement, we can observe the process of myelination in action. We see she is able to control her forearms by batting her arms, and then using her wrists by transferring objects between hands, and finally her fingers as she refines her pincer grip. We see she is able to control her thighs and knees to crawl, then her ankles to pull up and stand, and finally she is able to control her toes to be able to walk. If we follow the process of myelination and observe where the baby is at developmentally, we will know when to offer different objects to stimulate movement.

While the baby greatly enjoys crawling, she will also enjoy her newfound ability to sit independently and observe life from this upright position. At this stage, it is important to offer objects so she can use her two hands working together, such as connecting a wooden egg with a cup. It is around this time that she will begin to go through a period of establishing object permanence. Toys such as the box and tray, box and drawer, box with push balls, and box and drawer with knitted ball will not only help her build hand-eye coordination, but will also aid her intellectually as she learns that when something is not in sight, it still exists. It is during this time that it is also important to offer opportunities to refine wrist and finger coordination such as using rings and a peg. By starting with a set of wide rings she will become successful with limited wrist rotation. Once she has mastered these wide rings, we recommend offering smaller rings such as napkin rings to challenge her fingers to grasp in various ways. After this you can offer her traditional ring stackers with coloured discs according to a gradation with a smaller centre to further refine hand-eye coordination.

Soon the baby will want to explore more things than those at sitting and crawling level. She will begin reaching up and pulling herself up. Having low, heavy furniture such as a coffee table with rounded corners, an ottoman, sofa, armchair, window sill, cabinet door, or a secured shelf will provide opportunities for her to pull herself up. A low bar, similar to a ballet bar, provides the perfect opportunity for her to pull herself up, and is even more interesting if there are lovely pictures to look at or a window to look out.

From here, she will then begin cruising around the ottoman, along the bar or sofa, and taking a step back as she opens the cabinet door. During this time she is strengthening different muscles in her feet which will enable her to be able to walk forwards, backwards, and sideways, depending on the type of furniture onto which she is holding. It is important to try to give her as much time as possible without any shoes or socks so she can develop the muscles in her feet and gain a sense of balance without interference of shoes or socks. When necessary to provide coverings for her feet, such as when outdoors in the cold, we recommend soft-soled shoes so her feet can develop naturally.

While we are tempted to offer her our hands, we want her to gain a deep sense of self-satisfaction by carrying out these movements herself. She deepens her spatial awareness as she propels herself along these different furnishings and she will further develop her spatial awareness as we offer a walker wagon or other push walker. The walker wagon offers the baby the ability to pull up on the box and gain security with her ability to stand before she pushes off with her walker. Weighing down the box of the wagon or using it on grass will also slow down the movement of the walker before she is ready to take off with it.

As she becomes more confident and more coordinated with her movements, she will begin holding on with one hand. She will begin testing her balance and standing unaided. Before you know it, she will be taking her first steps and that gorgeous smile of delight will appear. She will be filled with self-confidence and a new eagerness to explore her world!

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